Nobody Does It Better

I have a confession to make. I may be among like-minded souls so perhaps it won't sound all that crazy. This just goes to show you how the youth of America are corrupted by television and it's a sad sad truth that I was no exception. Growing up, and by that I mean junior high and middle school, I had a style icon like no other. I wanted her hair, her clothes, her room, her life. But mostly just her clothes. I modeled many things after her, and she wasn't even real. She was a character on a TV show.

It was...

CLARISSA MARIE DARLING.

Can I get an amen or a hallelujah?

Clarissa, the narrator and star of Clarissa Explains It All, was The Absolute Hotness for sooo many reasons and I was convinced that with a little extra work my life could mirror hers. First, we had the same middle name! Also, our initials were the same, too: C.M. Well, two thirds of our initials were the same. Additionally, we were the blond, female first borns in a two-child, two-parent household, and felt our younger siblings were a major pain in the you know what.

Clarissa was very much convinced that she was actually very smart and observant for a young person, and if the rest of the world would just listen to her, things would be better all around. My own semi-megalomaniacal mind worked in a similar fashion.

Clarissa was kind of like Blossom or Carrie Bradshaw in the fact that in pretty much each scene of each show, she'd have a completely different outfit on. Each outfit, to me, was the most creative, beyond-cool thing that could have possibly been acheived, no doubt pulled together by some poor stylist working for minor ducats at Nickeloeon Studios.

Style-wise, Clarissa was all about COLORS and LAYERING. She also rocked some great accessories, especially the occasional statement hat. I remember getting into an argument with my mother at a Gap in 1993 because I reeeeaaally wanted a cream-colored crocheted skull cap that cost $14.50 and she refused to buy it! Earlier that year we had a similar confrontation at Brass Plum when I was absolutely aching for a deep purple felt Panama hat with a black band around the brim. I emerged the loser on both occasions. Clarissa's outfits, however, were always winners.

Observe:

The classic early-1990s rainbow crocheted sweater! Nice headband too (she often wore headbands in a variety of colors).

Print on print AND a Keith Haring t-shirt for the win!!!!

This is a pretty tame outfit by Clarissa standards, but I include it because we get a semi-detailed shot of her room. You see, during eighth grade, our family moved to a new house in the same city that we were already living in. We designed the house with the help of a contractor, and I had the very fortunate opportunity to come up with the floorplan of my room. Guess whose room I modeled mine after? Uh-huh!

I had the window and window seat in the same spot. I had my bed on the right with the headboard up against the wall in the same position. I had the dresser drawers right where they are in this photo. I also wanted to decorate my wall with hubcaps but again, mom stepped in on that one and nixed those plans.

I don't remember the show being all that funny or interesting, but visually, it knocked me off my feet and I rarely missed an episode. Was anyone out there a bigger fan of Clarissa (and her clothes) than me?